Friday, May 25, 2012

Leap Lemmings Leap


We are the circus clowns of the industry.
We make no decisions on what people are offered.
They flock like sheep to the newest offerings.
Half of which will never work.
(sram front derailleurs).
But they are offering it in Black now...
The industry works in crazy ways. 
We think we are different than the rest.
We cycle.
In fact, we just repackage the same crap in different boxes.
Anodized bits and pieces anyone?
‘Cause that was never done before...
Neon?
Nope never been done before...


Now I am probably joining the old grumpy guy club,
but someone has to use their head.

How much more fucking nonsense
are they going to feed us????

fucking

Never ever seen that eh?



or...


So really?

How many more bad ideas are we going to pony up a ton of money for?

I am a betting man.
And I am willing to bet 
that a shitton of you are
going to go jump on road disc brakes.


Fuck.
That.

How can I possibly trust that a frame manufacturer
is going to do their homework?

I mean real fucking work.
Like for say,
 compensate for some idiot putting too big of a rotor on his bike?
You know,
for more power?

Right. 


US mechanics know there is more than one idiot out there.



Like the one who will put SRAM on their bike.
Let's just say until they can figure out how to make any mountain bike brake work,

Fuuuuuuck that.
No sir, not me.



That shit is dumb.



Don't get me wrong.
I like the technology and the advancements.

But slow your fucking roll.
There is no need for it.

No one needs electronic shifting.



Hey.

gobackupthereandreaditagain


Really.
You
 don't.

Is it badass. Yup.

But realize, as you continue to vote with your dollars and 
keep up with the fucking Jones',

the rest of us,

live in reality.


What the hell was ever wrong with this?


Honestly, its lived longer than most of you, 
and certainly longer than a lot of the media/marketing lemmings
who are pushing this down your throat hole.


You going to call an electrician
or roll down the street to the bike shop?

(trick question asshat, we all know you are loading the Bimmer right now to drive
two blocks over to Starfucks, and then coming down in a hizzy
because you just had to win the Tuesdaynightshoprideworldfuckingchampionshits.)



Bring me a beer.


I am the one giving you the grimy handshake.

the wrenches speak the truth.

We get paid either way

but yelled at only one way.



yourbikedoesnotneedelectric.